Trump Said the Ceasefire Is Over, Then Said the War Won't Restart

Iran struck 85 sites in Bahrain and Kuwait. Oil jumped 5%. The Dow fell 577 points. The Nasdaq rose anyway, because chip stocks needed a win more than the rest of the market needed peace.

📊 THE MARKET BREAKDOWN

Satirical daily market intelligence for traders who think in systems, not headlines.

Issue #269 | July 8, 2026